Adventures with running!

I do not like running.

I have told many people that I don’t run because I don’t want to knock myself out (gigantic tits).

I ran today.

It was mostly downhill, see. Downhill is easy. Gravity does most of the work for you! We have a hill road that leads up to the street we’re on that I am sure I’ve talked about before. It’s half a mile down and half a mile back. I ran halfway down the hill, which means roughly a quarter of a mile. I was fine. I felt good! My calves wanted to cramp at one point when I was walking, but they never did and the worry went away. I was proud of myself. Nothing hurt (the last time I attempted running, my shins REALLY hurt). Got to the bottom of the hill/end of the street and paused. I was going to run up the hill.

And I did.

For about 1/8th of a mile. The way the hill goes is 2% incline to OMFG 8% INCLINE. I told myself, “Make it to the top of this incline, you can walk the rest of the way up.” And I tried. So hard. Halfway up the 8% incline and my body gave out. If I didn’t stop, I was going to collapse.

And then I had to walk up the rest of the hill (which becomes a 9% incline and then a steady 7% incline) to get home. Fuck. I didn’t think this through.

I got home. I almost passed out going up the stairs. I made it up the hill that my body didn’t want to go up. And then spent the next 10 minutes trying to calm my heart rate, breathe, and not pass out, all at once. It’s 50 degrees out with a really nice breeze. Cloudy, not too hot, it’s been raining most of the morning. I get in the house that is 70 degrees and has no breeze. I almost immediately passed out, so I had to rush back outside to the chair on the patio.

I don’t regret this. I did my stretches, logged my work, and felt great once I finally ate something! I didn’t hurt anything, which is the good sign, my body just gave out on me. I am still not used to the elevation and lack of oxygen. I am sure when I get back to Portland that I will be able to run better (thinking of running in Washington Park…so exciting!). My lungs still kind of burn, and it’s been over an hour since I finished.

Did my stretches, and collapsed in front of the computer. This was a major break for me seeing as I was in a boot for the majority of the past 5 weeks. My toe felt slightly uncomfortable, but didn’t hurt to the point where I had to limp or couldn’t put all my weight on it. This makes me happy, and makes me want to do some more tae bo. I might end up doing that tomorrow depending on how I feel. :)

Oh, and I was able to do NINE real push ups today, a jump from 6 for several days in a row. Fucking WOOT. :D

What do you mean it’s 2 in the morning?

Yeah, so this is mostly going to be a hilarious post. Mostly because fuck you, that’s why.

It’s 2 am. Why am I awake? Because I didn’t take my sleeping pills early enough, and because my recorded copy of Eureka decided to stop playing 32 minutes into the show (I was all emotionally riled up, you see…I CAN’T sleep like that!). Fuck you, copy. Fuck you right in your ear.

SPEAKING OF EARS, lemme tell you. In case you haven’t seen me whining about it over on Twitter (seriously, I don’t shut up about it right now), I have a middle ear infection that can just fuck the fuck right off. It’s affecting my swallowing (insert sexual joke here (insert “that’s what she said” and a fucking high five right here)), my TMJ (ohay, I totally wanted a flare up that lasted DAYS), my sinuses (god fucking dammit why is everything fucking connected in there), and giving me constant headaches. THANKS, EAR. Actually, I should be thanking my finger. If my ears weren’t so GOD DAMN ITCHY all the fucking time, I wouldn’t scratch them until they bleed, making infections happen. :|

Totally going for the record of most cussing in a paragraph. Did I win?

Oooh, that was mostly fuck’s, too. *high fives self* (which is pretty much just clapping, yo)

So, totally stopped wearing the boot today and went out for an hour in regular shoes. Now, I did this with my husband 2 weekends ago when he came out, but my foot hurt so bad by the time we got home that I had to put it up. Today, other than feeling weird in a normal shoe (not to mention the fact that it was a new shoe I hadn’t worn on that foot yet), I felt fine! No pain when I got home. Still going to take it easy, but I don’t need to wear it all day right now, and can not wear it when I go out for the most part! Excited!

I am still going to take it really easy with exercising, though. I am going to continue doing what I have been since Friday (push ups every day and ab workouts every other day) for about a week, and then slowly get back into Tae bo and get my serious calorie burning back. :D I seriously miss sweating that much. And I cannot wait to be able to go hiking again. That I will REALLY have to ease into, because you use your toes so much when hiking, I just don’t want to re-injure myself. Super cautious right now.

Also, speaking of push ups, I have been successfully doing 10 every day since Friday. It hurt Saturday and Sunday, but now I am mostly okay with it. I am still on my knees (another sexual joke referenced here) while doing them because I am being cautious about my toe/foot, but next week when I bump it up to 15, I will try it like a real man. *pounds chest with fist*

Now for shit that no one really cares about: Changes in my body.

Laying in bed watching TV at the same time my husband was watching TV (that’s how we roll with this long distance shit, yo), I noticed that my side boob roll ceases to exist! This is a HUGE step for me. I can’t remember the last time I didn’t have that god damn armpit boob roll while lying down on my stomach that it’s just a fucking pleasure to not have it anymore! It’s smooth. Seriously, it’s like this now (fuck you, ignore the girl, and look at her side boob and how there’s NO ROLL THERE). That really, really excites me, guys. No, not the girl (okay, maybe a little). It’s really the only noticeable thing right now that I am legitimately excited about. I am so proud of the changes I’ve made to my body, and cannot wait for more of the changes. :D I will be thiiiiiiiiiin.

Okay. Enough of my fueled rants on …well, nothing, pretty much. :) Going to finish reading Failbook, and then going to sleep, or something resembling it. :3

TA, MY LOVELIES. <3

Partial recap of the month…

So, some of you might remember that I posted about my goal to lose 5 lbs this month in this post. I had been slacking. Letting myself slip. I was really depressed most of February because I had to leave my husband behind in Portland. I know I will be able to see him again (unlike my boys), but it’s really painful to be so far away. Whoever fucking said that distance doesn’t matter when you love something so much was in utter denial. Distance is everything to me right now. >:(

ANYWAY. *cough*

Yes. I didn’t cut back on alcohol much, but I did make sure to not go COMPLETELY over my calories, or do some heavy exercise the next day. There were a couple times where that didn’t happen. In fact, a lot of this week I ended up going over on my calories, but not by much. My gain this week was only 0.8 lbs, so I don’t find that as TOO bad. My gains have been quite small compared to the previous week’s loss! And this gain still kept me over my weight loss goal for this month!

I should probably say what that was!

My weight on 3/2 was 243.6 lbs. My weight today is 236.4 lbs. Total loss this month is 7.2 lbs! More than my goal (woohoo) and almost spot on with my monthly average I mentioned in the post linked above.

Today was also measurement day, but I had absolutely no loss with that in the past 2 weeks. That right there is quite odd to me, because I am pretty sure I’ve always had a loss with my measurements before. To be fair, though, I WAS measuring myself with a stretchy string…lol!

I don’t know if I mentioned it here on the blog, but I am wearing a boot for my retarded broken toe. It hasn’t been healing. It’s almost there, but then I exercise or walk around for longer than an hour and all of a sudden it’s swollen for a day or two again. So, I threw the boot on and I’m taking it easy for a bit. Only a week right now, but we shall see how I am on Tuesday or Wednesday without it on. I don’t WANT to wear the boot when Chris is here next week (OMFG SIX DAYS GUYS), but I will do it if my body says I have to.

Another idea was given to me by The Biggest Loser last night with money incentive for loss. Not the $1,000 they were doing per pound, but the idea is still cool nonetheless. With me wearing the boot right now, though, the incentive is just kind of wasted. I can’t do many exercises, so I’m only eating healthy right now (well, yeah, mostly). But once I am out of this boot, it’s on like fucking Donkey Kong!

Speaking of The Biggest Loser, holy fuck, was this last episode just FULL of the worst advertisements I’ve seen in a while. The beginning of the show was pretty much nothing but a huge ad for Newman’s. Holy. Fucking. Shit. I really only slightly pay attention to the show now. An hour and a half (on Hulu) is entirely too long for it now. Just…ugh. /rant

I’m teaching myself how to code! I want to be useful! Learning JavaScript right now. Will be teaching myself Python in the future. No, this is not a place to suggest what to learn. I’ve already made up my mind. :P I discovered Codecademy yesterday, and I fucking love it. The math is getting harder, but I am having so much fun actually making things WORK. :3

It’s rainy season here! Klamath Falls apparently has proper seasons here! This is good news for me, because it means it will be warming up soon, and I might be able to go HIKING again! YAY. I mean, I can’t do anything with this stupid ass toe, but shortly I will be able to hike and see the town all green (instead of this mucky brown shit). We have also been talking about going to Crater Lake and the lava tunnels here in Southern Oregon, both of which I am really excited to go to. Lots of hiking involved with both, and I LOVE exploring. :D

I probably won’t post an actual weight post next Friday seeing as my husband will be here, and he’s more important than any of you fuckers (yeah, I said it…). I don’t expect to have much of a web presence then, so here’s a warning. I’ll try to remember to post about the boot and if I still have to wear it.

This. Is the end of the post.

I HAVE A CLOTH TAPE MEASURE

…and I know how to use it!

No, really, I do.

Some of you might remember my measurements I was taking almost 2 months ago (god, have I really been this lazy…). I was using a string, that was kind of stretchy, and putting that on a regular tape measure. Not quite accurate, but I had made it work, mostly.

So, I am starting my measurements from THIS entry now, since I know that they are accurate. They are as follows:

  • Neck: 17
  • Bust: 49
  • Ribs: 40.5
  • Waist: 50.5
  • Hips: 53

I gained 3.2 lbs this week, making me JUST AT my 10% weight loss goal. That’s slightly depressing. I will have to work hard to lose weight again.

Oh, right. Broken toe (which, we’ve pretty much confirmed it is…).

This is a bump in the road, and I know I can get around it, but I can’t do the things that help me lose weight quickly. Time to find ways to exercise that doesn’t include my feet.

We did, last night. Well, my lovely husband did. YouTube videos for high energy exercises that you do in an office chair. Pretty freaking awesome if you tell me. I’m worried about a couple of them because they have you lift your knee up, but I am fairly confident I can lift my knee up without using my toes thanks to kick boxing.

I miss kick boxing so much. It’s not offered anywhere here.

So, I have up to 4 weeks of not heavily using my toes, which means 4 weeks of no hiking. Tomorrow I am taping up my toe. I injured it again last night while getting a Coke Zero, put all my weight on the foot, so I want to have one more day of it being elevated without being taped up. I’ll probably still keep it elevated while it’s taped, but we’ll see how I feel.

I am quite discouraged by this injury. All I want to do is eat all the shitty stuff that I do to make myself feel better. I feel useless. I miss everything. And now I can’t go hiking, which I love to do, because I ran into the fucking couch. I believe it sent my depression spiraling. I am hoping the exercises my husband found will help keep me active. I’ve lost a lot of tone (but not really muscle), so I feel kind of like I’ve given up on myself, even though that’s not the case.

Sorry for the kind of downer post. I’m really not happy with myself, and it’s kind of hard to pump myself up when all I feel is self-loathing. Now I need to figure out how to get out of this without gaining ALL the weight. Need to stay over my 10% weight lost blip. I don’t know if I can handle going back up right now. :\

Well, this happened…

I am about 90% sure I broke my pinky toe yesterday. The other 10% says jammed or dislocated, but everything doesn’t quite match up with those.

No, I will not go to the ER. With no insurance, all they will do is tell me they can’t cast the toe anyway and send me on my way with a $2,000 bill for xrays. :\ I broke a toe on the same foot when I was 11, and that’s all the doctor told me then, too.

I walked into a couch. A couch that is pretty solid. With only my pinky toe. Unlike most people, though, a string of profanities did not come out of my mouth. No, when I get injured, I’m fairly quiet about the whole thing. Which kind of shocked my step dad, seeing as I say ‘fuck’ every other sentence when I speak.

I have the mouth of a sailor.

Well, what that means is that I have to stay off of my feet for at least 3 days. Ice, rest, elevation. This really sucks because I was planning on shoveling snow over the next couple days, but can’t now! I also can’t go hiking for at least 2 weeks.

Fuck.

This sucks. /sigh