Unpopular opinion time: Fat Activists

I need to preface this with a warning: I am not against size acceptance. My goal size is still considered “plus size”, and I fully understand the hate that is towards severely obese people. Now on to what I don’t agree with (again).

I have previously written about “no wrong way to have a body“. I am very vocal about this because there are wrong ways to have bodies. Being severely obese and severely underweight are extremely damaging to your body in several different ways. Being underweight makes it so you don’t have enough energy during the day, and can leave you with a weakened immune system. Being severely obese opens you up to a world of issues including sleep apnea, diabetes, high blood pressure, high blood cholesterol, and high triglycerides (all pretty much affecting your heart).

I am not saying that this is how everyone is, at all. I am still considered obese by the BMI scale (which, I have stated before, is complete bullshit, but doctors still go by it) and my blood pressure is so perfect that when I went to Planned Parenthood last week I got COMPLIMENTS from the nurses. I haven’t had my blood checked yet, but I am certain that my numbers have improved (even at 280, they were really close to perfect). There are plenty of other “overweight” and “obese” people who are in the same category, and this post doesn’t pertain to you. I will warn that even though you don’t have issues now, though, that does not mean that you won’t in the future. Fat doesn’t build just around your skeletal muscles, it builds around your organs, making them heavy, discolored, and change the way they work. Problems will likely arise in the future.

My problem right now isn’t the people who are overweight and still healthy; the ones that actually do exercise and eat healthy on a constant basis (not just “OOH I ATE A SALAD FROM THIS PLACE”, not realizing that salad is actually worse than a burger from said place), or the overweight people who have problems that make them fat, regardless of any combination of exercise, diet, and medication. My problem are the people who hide behind “size acceptance” as an excuse to eat to their heart’s desire and not do a god damn thing about it. The ones who call themselves “fat activists” (which sounds like someone who is an activist that is fat). The ones who completely overeat, then do a minimal amount of exercise to say they did something. The ones who don’t even try to make themselves better. I was told the best thing today: They are glorifying being fat and not promoting self-acceptance.

You cannot be an activist if you haven’t petitioned to any government official about change. I seriously hate how that word is just thrown around everything, just like the word “socialist”. You aren’t picketing, you aren’t protesting anywhere, you aren’t doing anything but complaining online about people not accepting you. Almost every “fat activist” I have seen has done nothing but hide behind the phrase as means to eat whatever they want in whatever size portion and use it to make them feel better about themselves. This is damaging to the cause of size-acceptance.

Where the fuck do we draw the line? Really? I am for self-acceptance and size-acceptance to a point. If you decide to glorify being lazy and overeating, you are doing harm to this cause. If you don’t decide to make a change in your life, complain about being lethargic or tired all the time, and then preach self-acceptance, you are doing harm to this fucking cause. You are demeaning the value of all the other people who ARE working hard towards getting healthy or the ones who are just trying to maintain their weight instead of gaining. That is god damn insulting to those people.

So, please, if you decide you want to be all for size acceptance, think about if you are hiding behind that cause to continue to be unhealthy, or if you are doing everything you can to make sure you stay healthy at a larger size.

The Different Degrees of Body Shaming

I understand the posts about body shaming. I know it’s wrong. There really is no wrong way to have a body. However, there is a difference between being unhealthy and being overweight/underweight.

You can be overweight and still be healthy. Because of the stupid BMI calculator (the single most piece of shit in medical books ever), most people are overweight. People can look completely normal and still be in the “overweight” category. People can be in the “underweight” category and still be completely healthy. You can also be at an unhealthy range of “overweight” and “underweight”. Those become a problem when you can’t do day-to-day activities without the help of a scooter or when you think you can always lose more weight at 5’10 and 98 lbs. That is unhealthy, and that is no way to live. These people need help.

What is wrong is making someone feel like utter shite because they are ashamed of how they look and feel. Yes, people should feel happy about their bodies. The funny thing, even the people who are saying that they are proud of their bodies are pretty miserable with theirs, too (I’ve seen several admit this). Everyone has self-esteem issues. Everyone. I cannot stress that enough. The easiest (and most hilarious) way I can show this is with a clip from the movie White Chicks. I am pretty sure that every girl out there (and a lot of guys) has thought this at least once in their life. It happens. People get depressed, they gain weight, lose weight. Every body is different on what is healthy and what isn’t. A generic range isn’t going to work for everyone.

I have severe health problems caused by me being overweight. And I use that term to be nice to myself. I am obese. My blood pressure is really the only thing that’s been normal on me since I got over 200 lbs. I was pre-diabetic as of a year ago (I haven’t been to the doctor in so long because of moving and not having insurance), one test away from being declared diabetic. I have poly cystic ovaries; I am very near being infertile. I am bipolar II. Being obese made all of these worse. All of them. I get depressed easier, I ovulate less, and storing fat doesn’t help my body process insulin correctly (I am insulin resistant because of the PCOS).

Over the past few months I have been exercising more, eating better, fitting into my clothes better. I’ve been buying smaller clothes than the size that I am because I am losing the weight. I am working hard towards something. I can now hike for HOURS without getting tired. I can probably break cheek bones with a single punch now. I don’t shake when I get really hungry anymore (a sign of low blood sugar that most diabetics get). I have goals, I am achieving them, and I feel better about myself (slowly, but surely, I am getting happier). Making me feel like attempting to be happy with the way I am, just like how you say you are happy with the way you are, is a bad thing is not what “no body shame” should be about. Yes, you’re happy and accepting that you are the way you are. That’s fine. You are all making me feel like the hard work I put in is useless because I should just be happy with the way I am.

I am not like that. I cannot just settle for being the big girl, being out of shape, being tired all the time. You go ahead and be happy with the way you are, but don’t talk down to me because I want to be healthy. There is an unhealthy way to have a body. You wouldn’t tell a starving kid in Africa that they should just be happy with how they are, and you wouldn’t tell someone that weighed over 400 lbs that they should continue living the way they do.