My bad, yo.

It’s been a couple weeks since I posted. I last posted about the wondrous soon-to-be-ex-roommate. I have done 2 weigh ins since then, and had a realization about everything.

I have gained both weeks, but nothing huge. I haven’t even gained a whole pound total, so I am not too upset. I realized over this past week, though, that I haven’t been sleeping much. Sleep is a HUGE factor in weight loss. If you aren’t getting enough of it for your body to rest and reset, you aren’t going to lose very well. I only have one more week of 5 hour nights and long days at work, and not even a full week! This week is my last week in training, and we only have a three day week. It’s going to be beautiful. And next Sunday, I start on the phones and will be moved into the new place.

We bought Chris a real cell phone yesterday. We haven’t had a real cell phone in 3 years. The number we’ve had for the past year and a half is just a simple flip phone. The new phone is an Android based phone (the AT&T Fusion) and still a prepaid phone. But it’s a fairly decent phone with a new number and our roommate doesn’t have the number! We’ll be buying me the same phone tomorrow, and for the first time in 3 years, Chris and I will have separate phones. Kind of crazy.

Speaking of ways that our roommate cannot get a hold of us! Not only are we getting rid of the old number, but we have created a new email address that will forward any emails from her to. The new email address has Vacation Responder set up to say that we don’t accept emails from crazy people anymore. We’re leaving a bogus forwarding address in case she decides to come visit us. She is going to hate us, and I am going to be happy that she will never be able to reach us. Get this drama filled life behind me.

I realized yesterday where my problem with most roommates is. I hate girly girls. Well, don’t hate, I just really don’t get along with most of them. Probably because most of them are batshit crazy. Chris even realized that he hates girls. The only women he likes are the ones that I absolutely adore. Shannon, my mom, Lorien…the one thing we all have in common? We AREN’T. THAT. GIRLY. I should probably filter people more…

That’s it for me now. I’ll post more next weekend when I move. It shall be fun. :)


Woohoo! A loss!

Wasn’t much of a loss, but pretty much everything I gained last week has been lost this week. :D That makes me happy. Back down to 229.4 lbs.

I ran into another couch earlier this week. Monday night, to be exact. Resulting in…a sprained toe. The same toe that I broke. I was really scared that I broke it again, but when I woke up Tuesday and the pain had mostly subsided, I was quite thankful. However, I spent all of Tuesday and Wednesday off my feet for the most part. Yesterday I went and got my hair cut (still need to dye it, jeebus), and today I went out and decided my toe was well enough for exercising. I went without Chris, since we ended up staying up later than we wanted last night. And no, my toe didn’t like it, but it didn’t completely stop me, either. That’s a good sign for me. :)

I did well, methinks. I did a lot of the stuff that Chris and I do together, upped a lot of the weight (oh, my abs might hate me later), and even found a good pectoral fly machine that makes sure only your pecs are working. I did 30 minutes total on the elliptical, and my normal stretches. Then …I got naked in the gym.

Okay, this is probably literally the first time I’ve been naked in public since high school swim class… (Totally not counting those times….wait…my mom reads this blog. HI, MOM.) And I would just like to point out that I didn’t feel…exposed at all. It was really weird. I didn’t have any anxiety about it, I just did it. The entire month I’ve been going to the gym, I have been telling myself, “They all have the same body parts as you, they are all here to get healthy, and they are all in their own little worlds.” And it’s true. It helped so much telling myself that for so long. I still felt awkward when I had to not have panties on (it’s TOM, and I don’t wear tampons anymore since my period isn’t that heavy), but it was just slightly awkward.

I’m oddly proud of myself. I have super horrible anxiety problems. I don’t think I’m ready to be taking nude photos of myself yet, but I have some confidence now. It’s…freeing.

I looked at pictures of me from November. I told myself I wasn’t going to post those kinds of progress photos; the ones where you stand in front of stuff to see how much you have changed. But I will be. Tomorrow, in fact. I hope it really shows as much progress as I see. :D

This is my last week not working. I start up at Stream on Monday at 6 am. It’s going to be weird. Chris and I will see each other for my lunch daily and on the weekends. That’s it. We’ll be sleeping half of our sleep together, and exercising separately. For 4 weeks. At least I get to see him some. This has made me super anxious for the past few days. I do this, though. I will force myself through it and will be happier for it. Happens every time.

:3 See you all tomorrow with some “nakie” pictures of myself. :D

How does this not depress you?

Fact of the matter is that I gained this week. And not the measly little things I had been gaining before. I gained 2.5 lbs this week, and ended back up into the 230’s.

Two weeks of gaining hit me really, REALLY hard today. I am still not discouraged by any means, but I am super disappointed in myself. I wouldn’t have been so depressed if my measurements came back as actually losing something significant. I kind of want to cry again just thinking about it. If I gain again next week, I don’t know what I am doing wrong to actually be gaining. I haven’t had a gain so large after a week of gaining before, and it just hit me so hard that I gained so much. Most of the time that I gained this much, the week prior I had lost a large number, so it was expected!

I’m mostly fine now. I am pretty sure that this past weekend affected me more than I thought it would. I saw something on Twitter from @Fitness that said “diet mistakes are harder to overcome than missed workouts. ” It has to be so true in this case. I have indulged before, but never to the extent of not logging, and of the amount of sugar that I did.

And at least it wasn’t double that weight that I gained.

Measurements! Doing both mine and Chris’ from now on! Mine:

  • Neck: 15.5 (0)
  • Bust: 47.0 (0)
  • Ribs: 38.0 (0)
  • Waist: 44.25 (-0.75)
  • Hips: 50.0 (0)

For Chris, we’re tracking a couple more things. I expect things to change up and down for him more on his biceps, and not much to change on his hips since we measure under his belly (where he wears his pants).

  • Neck: 18.0
  • Bicep: 16.5
  • Ribs: 49.5
  • Waist: 48.5
  • Hips: 47.0
  • Thigh: 24.75

Since he won’t keep track of these anywhere else, I will keep track of them for him. I am just happy that he is letting me do this. :3

(If you have met my husband,  you will know that if he doesn’t want something done to him, he will make sure it doesn’t happen.)

That’s it for today. Lazy, hot weekend ahead of us, but good, nonetheless. Back to it Monday, and hoping for a much better week next week. :\

Something seems to be working!

This week was a terrific loss! It’s the most I’ve lost in a week for a month now, and I am so happy with it. I am down exactly 3 lbs this week, but I have even more news! I ACTUALLY saw the fat percentage go down. This is the first time in 6 months I’ve actually seen it drop, and it made me seriously happy. I still think it’s lying to me, but it moved after months of never changing!

Today was also measurement day. I will get to those shortly.

I spent the week on my back. Much like a hooker, but without the money and sex. As I said earlier this week, I have a suspected herniated disc. It’s not fun. I can’t really sit up without some sort of assistance still. And today my pleurisy decided it was going to flare up after years of not having a bad event. So, it’s been an interesting day, but I worked through it all.

Did SO many exercises that I can’t even begin to think of everything we did. I went up in weight for most everything, though, and did lower reps. Always stopped before I hurt myself. I have a feeling that I will be sore tomorrow, which is fine, not much to do this weekend. I worked out every muscle I could except for calve lifts (since I would be jumping on the elliptical). The elliptical was a challenge today. I don’t know what it was about it, but 9 minutes in and I was just not feeling it. I was tired. Told myself at 10 minutes I would stop. Ten minutes hit, I kept going. Reminded myself that I wasn’t in pain, out of breath, or dying, and that I could fucking suck it up. Finished my last 10 minutes. Felt like a champ after I finished it, too. Didn’t burn as much as I have before on it because I was slacking hardcore the first 10 minutes, but I was only a few calories short. :3

All in all, did about an hour and a half of weights (sharing machines with my husband) and 22 minutes of cardio. It was a good day. I hope I feel it! :D


  • Neck: 15.5 (0)
  • Bust: 47.0 (-0.5)
  • Ribs: 38.0 (0)
  • Waist: 45.0 (-1)
  • Hips: 50.0 (-0.25)

I can see everything I’m losing on my waist. It’s pretty amazing. My hips are slower, but hopefully with the next measurement day (in 2 weeks), I will drop below 50 inches!

I am officially past 15% again. Will have to do the Japanese Gardens soon like we planned. :3 My husband will be so happy about that. :)

No more days for now, but terrific news!

First, I have been here less than a week, and I have a job. It doesn’t start until July, but I totally have an offer, and I will be starting with the next class.

Details: It’s with Chris at Stream. I’ll be doing the basic, general tech support for Xbox. Super easy job, super easy commute, and with the man I love again. We’ll be making essentially double what we are now, and most of what I make will go towards “splurging” (what little we actually splurge on) and savings for the ceremony. SO freaking awesome, really. :D I am excited to start. Especially since it means that I get to have my awesome hair colors (I totally interviewed with pink hair!).

Second! I lost weight this week…after gaining weight. Well, ish. I changed back to the scale I was originally weighing myself with, and it is all sorts of fucked up right now. So, I went back to 38 lbs lost (since I started My Fitness Pal). I lost 2.2 lbs since then, so I am good about it. I am on the right track to continuing to lose weight. And I did my measurements today, which was a loss almost everywhere!

  • Neck: 15.5 (0)
  • Bust: 47.5 (0)
  • Ribs: 38.0 (-0.25)
  • Waist: 46.0 (-1)
  • Hips: 50.25 (-0.25)

I am super proud of it all, as I should be. We haven’t been able to buy weights yet, but we have been walking SO much all week that it really hasn’t mattered. We have talked with someone from LA Fitness last week during Chris’ Fitness Month for his work. They have awesome deals, and I’m finally to the point where I can say it isn’t a waste of money right now. I have worked out enough by myself to know that I will use it if I have to, though we’re only planning on getting Chris an account. It allows him up to 2 friends to come in with him, so that really works out well. I’ll be able to use an elliptical and they have punching bags for the both of us! Kind of excited. We go to see the gym itself on Sunday.

Third! I am finally ready to announce that I will be going into the Air Force. Or, well, trying to. I know that right now I am too fat to go in. I still have to lose 60 more lbs before I can get into anything, but that should be easier here soon. All I need to be is under 170, and I am about to adjust everything that I need to again so that I can lose properly. I am really excited about this. I am not going in for a career, but to help boost my chances at being a cop. Two years of military service looks excellent on a resume to be a police officer, and that is my ultimate goal. I am still really excited about being a cop, and cannot wait at all for the chance to become one.

That all being said, life has gone entirely too smoothly recently, and I am waiting for something to just blow right up in my face. Chris and I have had a really terrible past couple of years. The fact that having this plan and everything actually WORKING OUT makes me feel like something bad is going to happen. That doesn’t mean it will, but I am severely cautious right now. I love it when things go my way. It’s really rare. I am extremely happy it all is working out, and really cannot wait for my life to begin! :3

Day 12: I remembered the day and weigh in!

For just waking up, the fact that I remembered the day is hilarious. To be fair, all I remembered was how bad I forgot yesterday’s day.

I DID LOSE WEIGHT THIS WEEK. Broke through my plateau (I hope) and through 15% and UNDER 230!!! That makes me so happy. My measurements even surprised me. :) I weigh 227.8 lbs today, and am so happy. Here’s my measurements!

  • Neck: 15.5 (0)
  • Bust: 47.5 (-0.5)
  • Ribs: 38.25 (-0.75)
  • Waist: 47.0 (-2)
  • Hips: 50.5 (-0.5)

Other than my neck, that is a loss everywhere. LOOK AT THAT LOSS ON MY WAIST. Two inches? Holy fuck. That there makes my total inches loss 29.25 inches. Almost 30 inches total! :D

I forgot to mention on here yesterday that I tried on my mom’s size 9 wedding BAND (which generally require to be slightly larger than your finger as opposed to the really thin engagement style rings, like mine). It slips on almost just fine. The wedding ring that I have on right now is a 12. It’s constantly slipping or twisting, but hasn’t completely fallen off yet. That really makes me happy.

I plan on keeping the ballet routine when I go back to Portland. Every month I’ll increase the reps or weight that I hold to adjust to the muscle I’m building. And will do good cardio on the days I don’t do these body weight/ball exercises. Seems like that will keep me on my toes enough. Will probably alternate between tae bo and actual kick boxing with the husband weekly, too. Along with running. Need to start doing that more. Will be easier at the lower elevation!

I am slightly worried about going back to Portland and how my diet will be shifted again. I don’t think it will be bad, but I had a shift when I moved here. I will be getting a lot of recipes that my mom does for me here, which are mostly Weight Watchers stuffs. That will help with a lot of dinners. Plus, I get to cook a lot of what I was cooking with Chris before, too, which makes me happy.

Today is supposed to be cardio, I might go walking around. I do feel good enough and really have no excuse not to, so I probably will later. :3

The plateau monster has eated me.

I lost 2 tenths of a pound this week. Really? The amount of work that I have been doing and I lost TWO TENTHS OF A POUND?

EDIT: I just pooped. Even after already having coffee, I ended up losing 0.4 more lbs, making a total of 0.6 this week. Better. Still plateaued.

Least to say, I’m a little pissed.

I have seen people say they hit plateaus for months. I have seen people say they hit a plateau for 2 years (5 pounds until goal, even). Plateaus fucking suck giant donkey dick, and I’m pissed at my body right now.

“Hey, hormones, I have a great idea! Let’s fuck with Melissa’s weight and see how pissed off we can get her!” exclaims my brain.

“Sure, brain! I mean, we have to listen to you anyway! You’re the control system!” I imagine my hormones replied.

*flips off her body*

I have officially been hanging in a 3 pound range (231-234) for the past month. Almost exactly. That is ridiculous! It’s officially a plateau in my head, and I don’t know what I can do to change it.

I am seriously lucky for my friends on Twitter. I don’t know what I would do right now, but two of them (the ones who had the plateaus I’ve mentioned) are on top of it and sending me all the plateau-breaking shit ever. Have to give a huge shout out to Sarah Nelson, because if it wasn’t for her, I wouldn’t have found Christie and Jenni (and Jenni’s husband, Adam). Christie and Jenni are all over it, handing me articles and tips on how to get out of this funk with my body. Quite thankful right now to have support from people who have lost weight and are now coaches for others losing weight. And it’s a huge plus that they are fucking hilarious, too. :) Massive love to them.

I’ll get out of this, I don’t know when, but I am going to change up my routine and shock my system a bit. Might go back to my belly dancing videos that do toning for a while instead of tae bo, look at my mom’s ballet exercises she got from Prevention magazine, and all the articles ever from Jenni and Christie.

OH. Right! Measurements! Which have changed! :)

  • Neck: 15.5 (0)
  • Bust: 48.0 (0)
  • Ribs: 39.0 (-0.5)
  • Waist: 49.0 (-0.5)
  • Hips: 51.0 (0)

Annoyed at my hips, as they haven’t changed in 6 weeks. Muscle gain is probably to blame for that with my running that I’ve started and uphill walking. BUT, I am going to change this up and see how I change in the next month. :)

And now, your reminder. There at the top right is a widget that explains my birthday wish, but you can totally check out the full blog post here. TL;DR – I am trying to raise money for a beginner’s roller derby set that I can get for my birthday. This will probably also help shake things up for me. :) You can donate here with PayPal or here with your credit/debit card. Thanks for ANY amount you can spare. If you can’t, try spreading the word for me.

The surprise weigh day!

So, if you didn’t read last night’s post, I decided to stick to weighing  myself once a week because I had a panic attack about such a small change.

Seriously, I really didn’t think that it would be so bad.

Anyway. Weight came in as plus one pound. Okay, body. Stop it. I’ve been hovering around 230 for a month. Just let me breeze past it. It’s like I go really well through the rest of the numbers, but once I get to a number that ends in zero, my body just fucking refuses to go past it.

My husband kindly pointed out that this is what happened around 250. I just checked my logs, and it happened around 240, too, but I wasn’t as concerned with it since I wasn’t really working out!

Trying to increase my heavy cardio workouts to 2 or 3 times a week right now. It’s been so long since I’ve done them that I really shouldn’t push myself.

I have been losing weight at a very steady pace, and this is all good. I cannot remember the last time I was in the 220’s, and was just really excited to get into them and past my 15% goal, too. *flips off the scale*

So, I’m going to be kind of grumpy today because I can. Doesn’t help that my back really hurts and I keep getting vertigo spells. I’ll be better tomorrow.

Last weekly weigh day!

Like I said earlier this week, I will no longer be weighing myself weekly. I think after nearly 6 months of every other week showing progress, I can safely say that biweekly weigh ins will be infinitely better than weekly ones.

This week I lost 3.6 lbs from last week, making me at exactly 40 pounds lost since I started this in November. I was 271 then, and I’m now 231. Forty pounds lost in 6 months is well within healthy range, and that makes me happy. Yes, it’s slow going; but I am happy with the progress I’ve made and will continue doing. When I moved to Portland, I was 284, and that was almost a year ago. Measurements!

  • Neck: 15.5 (0)
  • Bust: 48.0 (-0.5)
  • Ribs: 39.5 (0)
  • Waist: 49.5 (-0.5)
  • Hips: 51 (0)

I am super proud of myself. I have gone from a size 26 in pants to a size 20; a size 4X in shirts to a 2X, and in some cases, an XL. I have gone from being extremely weak and out of shape to being able to carry several bags of groceries from the car and up stairs. And I am not even half way to my goal.

I realized today that I don’t even pay attention to the weight loss anymore. I know it is going to happen, it’s just a question as to how much. Loss or gain doesn’t phase me anymore. I get excited when I get into the next lower “tens” of weight, and I love getting to percentage goals (in fact, this is 15% right here at 40 lbs lost…well, 14.7%, but that is DAMN close). The weekly weigh ins, though, just don’t do anything for me. I think changing it up to every 2 weeks will be better for me with this.

I’m going to a DERBY BOUT TOMORROW. I am so excited about this. It’s the first one I’ve been to in over a year. A friend of my mom’s is on the derby team in Redding, CA, and we’re driving down there to go see her skate! She’s actually on the roster. So excited for her. I miss going to derby. So much. And I cannot wait to be able to start preparing to join a team myself.

Now! I need to be off to eat, because I’ve been up well over 2 hours and haven’t done so. Bad, Missy.

Two days later weigh day yaaaaaay!

Yeah, no idea.

So, my 2 am rant Thursday morning was my last post. Friday should have been a post about my weigh in, but seeing as I was in a bunch of pain, I completely forgot.

See, I was pretty drugged up for most of Thursday and Friday. I was taking allergy pills to control … something? I don’t even remember  anymore. I do remember reading that it’s good for ear infection pain, so I was trying to control that. I had been taking ear drops for more pain. Lots of ibuprofen and naproxen. It was a crazy 2 days.

Thursday, the abscess in my throat popped. If you’ve never tasted infection, I don’t suggest ever doing it. It’s gross. Terribly gross. So gross that I went on Twitter and Facebook and hilariously bitched about it. So gross. *gag* I was exhausted Thursday. I got to sleep shortly after my blog, and woke up in severe pain 3 hours later. I stayed up until noon, was completely out of it, talked with the parents about going to the clinic to get checked, then slept another 4 hours. Woke up in so much pain that I couldn’t talk well, then it happened. Didn’t hear anything like a pop, but I immediately tasted gross and the pain went away. I knew exactly what happened. It’s not the first time I had a throat abscess, though the first time I went to the ER and had it popped. This was grosser.

Since I woke up at 4, I thought it was too late to go to the clinic. I suffered through until Friday. I didn’t sleep well; all I wanted to do was cry, but I knew if I cried that I would just squeeze the abscess from throat contractions and make that terrible taste again. Woke up, weighed myself (onto that soon), went to the clinic. Doctor told me that whatever it was was taking care of itself, but he wanted me on antibiotics to make sure that there isn’t a second infection. Highest dose I’ve ever been on, 500mg of amoxicillan 3 times a day. Freaking crazy.

Saturday, after 1 day’s dose of antibiotics, I felt worse. Large amount of pain, extremely tired, still draining; I was a wreck. However, I did REAL push ups for the first time. I was able to do 5 before having to go on my knees, but was able to do 6 today! Then I went out with the parents and shopped around for stuff for a bit. I saw baby chicks, baby bunnies, and baby DUCKS. It was awesome, and made me realize that I want chickens on the farm that my husband and I do. :D $2 each for a chick? HELL YEAH.

And today, I feel dramatically better! The swelling in my ear has gone down completely. My throat hasn’t drained in almost 24 hours. The pain is minimal in my throat. It’s a much better day. :)

I ended up gaining 2 pounds during the week. With how I was feeling, I kind of expected it, especially with a 6 lb loss the previous week. I decided that with the fluctuating that I have been doing these past few months, I am going to start weighing myself every 2 weeks, the same day that I do measurements. I’m not getting discouraged by the gain or stability that I see every other week. I just feel that every 2 weeks will show me an accurate loss more than every week will be.

It’s been GORGEOUS here in Klamath Falls. You know, minus the fact that the only tree blooming in the entire city is right outside my window (I wish I were joking). It’s a nice 80 outside right now. Breeze going on. I need some sun block (mental note). With me out of the boot, and this abscess finally being taken care of with antibiotics, I will be able to go hiking again soon! It’s supposed to rain on Thursday, I think. *checks weather* Apparently tomorrow night, too. I think I will wait to hike for another week, but I am excited. Also, I can get back into tae bo and gaining my muscle back! Oh! And I increase my push ups to 15 tomorrow.

This is a long post, and I’m kind of sorry for it. Lol. Only kind of. I generally don’t have anything of note to talk about, so my abscess is where you get ALL THE DETAILS. :D Anyway, more later when I start exercising again. :3

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